============================================================================
Archive Maintainer	: Please place in "combos" subdirectory
Newstuff Chroniclers	: Text file update ONLY (personal web site URL)
			  [************ NO NEED TO REVIEW ************]
Update to		: bombay72.zip and bombay72.txt
Advanced engine needed	: Boom compliant
Primary purpose		: Single play, no levels included
============================================================================
Title			: Bombay 72
Filename		: BOMBAY72.WAD
Release Date		: 30th November 1997, V0.7.20
Update Date		: 16th February 2006, V0.9.87
Author			: Martin Howe (a.k.a. The Crazy Cat)
Email Address		: martinhowe@myprivacy.ca
Web Site		: http://www.martinsobservationpost.net (personal)
Files By Author		: BOMBAY72 ........... play DOOM as a true predator!
			  BADGUYS ............ some spare monsters and items
			  CLEANWAD ...... personal upgrade of an old classic
Misc. Author Info	: DOOMer since 1993; Webmaster, Committee Member and
			  Kitten List holder for the Bombay and Asian Self
			  Breed Club (www.bombaybreedclub.org), which is
			  itself affiliated to the GCCF (www.gccfcats.org).
			  Webmaster and Committee Member of the London Cat
			  Club (www.londoncatclub.org), which is also
			  itself affiliated to the GCCF (www.gccfcats.org).
Description		: Ever wanted to take a Baron or Revenant on in a
			  fist (paw) fight on equal terms? Bombay72 recasts 
			  the player as a cat patterned after the Bombay 
			  incorporating some attributes of the sentient 
			  panther-like cat "Couerl" featured in A E van 
			  Vogt's short story "Black Destroyer" which later 
			  became Chapter 1 of "Voyage of the Space Beagle". 
			  Sratch, tear or swipe the enemy, throw flaming 
			  balls of fire at them and invoke feline deities 
			  Bast and Sekhmet to aid you in wreaking fire and 
			  death upon the demons of DOOM!
Revision summary	: Minor documentation updates; fixed GROWL/CHAINGUN
			  limitation for ZDoom (can't be fixed for BOOM).
Dedication:		  Bombay72 is dedicated to Jason Keble who rashly
			  told me that it couldn't be done <<evil grin>> and 
			  to "Crazy" Toffee (b13/09/91, d09/07/95), my 
			  mother's Bombay-like black cat whose gory crusade 
			  to de-mouse the neighborhood gave me the idea in 
			  the first place! (Imagine seeing the guts of a 
			  dead mouse on the doorstep every other morning, or 
			  walking across the front garden over a mass of 
			  feathers strewn across the lawn whilst hearing a 
			  rhythmic  *crunch*  *crunch*  *crunch*  emanating 
			  from under the tree, and you'll get the idea :-)
Additional Credits to	: ID Software (www.idsoftware.com)
			    for DOOM, of course
			  A E van Vogt (RIP)
			    for nightmaring up Coeurl
			  TiC (The Innocent Crew)
			    for issuing the TicFlame patch for general use
			  Loads of other people
			    for issuing collections of WAV files and such
			  Jon Trotter of TrotKatz
			    for introducing me to the Bombay cat breed
			    http://www.fortunecity.com/greenfield/garden/603/homepage/homepagex.html
			  Simon Brooks of Loddon, Norfolk
			    for playtesting and suggestions
			  Olivier Montanuy
			    for DeuSF, DeuTex, WinTex, etc
			  Greg Lewis
			    for DeHackEd
			  Anyone
			    who can tell me how to _pronounce_ "Coeurl" :-)
			  Bill Neisius
			    for DMGRAPH
			  Sanjay Vijendran (s.vijendran@ic.ac.uk)
			    for the original Starwars DOOM FORCE patch - it
			    gave me a clearer idea of how the Curse of Bast
			    might work in practice.
			  Jon (again) & friends, the Bombay Breed Club and
			    all of the cat fanatics and enthusiasts around 
			    the world who are developing, showing and 
			    generally promoting the Bombay and the other 
			    Asian breeds.
			  Kim Ghobrial
			    who is one of the most well-known US breeders of
			    GCCF-standard Burmese and Asian cats.
			    http://www.kimghob.com/cats/Index.html
============================================================================

* What is included *

New levels		: None
Sounds			: Yes
Music			: No
Graphics		: Yes
Dehacked/BEX Patch	: Yes (BEX in WAD, DEH supplied for non-Boom ports)
Demos			: No
Other			: Patches to run this with Aliens-TC and Sirens-TC
Other files required	: None

* Play Information *

Game			: DOOM and DOOM2 (including Final Doom)
Map #			: None (should work on any)
Single Player		: Designed for
Cooperative 2-4 Player	: No (needs graphics - wanna help?)
Deathmatch 2-4 Player	: No (needs graphics - wanna help?)
Other game styles	: Maybe?
Difficulty Settings	: N/A

* How to Install and Use *

Due to the illegality of distributing copyrighted id Software sounds and 
graphics, they must be taken from your Doom2 IWAD or else the default ones 
in BOMBAY72.WAD must be used. If you can live with the default ones or you 
do not have a legal copy of Doom2 or Final Doom (i.e., you are only using 
Doom or Ultimate Doom), just copy BOMBAY72.BIN to BOMBAY72.WAD: that's it.

If you have Doom2 or Final Doom then start a command-prompt, navigate to the 
directory in which you extracted Bombay 72, run the batch file install.bat 
and follow the instructions it gives you to create the file BOMBAY72.WAD. 
The file can then be used with all four DOOMs including Ultimate Doom. If 
you get the error "cannot open DOOM2.WAD for update" or similar during this 
process, it means that DMGraph and DMAud are trying to open your IWAD in the 
default "open file" mode (read/write) when there is no need to do so 
whatever (there is no need to update the IWAD when extracting graphics from 
it or when copying them into ANOTHER file). Just make a copy of your IWAD 
that is NOT read-only, re-extract the ZIP file, re-run the installer, then 
delete the COPY of the IWAD.

To USE this PWAD, you don't need a batch file or anything, just -file it as 
you would any other PWAD or use your favourite WAD launcher program. Note 
that however you run it, a Boom-compliant source port is required. I have 
personally found that ZDoom gives better results than PRBoom; furthermore,
PRBoom doesn't seem to get the timings of the various aspects of the BFG
weapon to work as expected). ZDoom also allows the GROWL/CHAINGUN limitation
to be fixed as chaingun sound can be separated from pistol sound.

!FOR BOOM PORTS, MAKE SURE YOU INCLUDE BOOMUSER.WAD WHEN RUNNING BOMBAY 72!

* Construction *

Base			: New from scratch
Build Time		: Thirty days or so
Editor(s) used		: WinTex, PhotoStudio, PaintShopPro, DeHackEd,
			  Windows XP (R) Sound Recorder.
Known Bugs		: In Boom ports, the troopers and chaingunners share
			  the same sound as the pistol and may sound a little
			  weird, as if they are using nonstandard guns. I have
			  not decided whether or not to keep this. If you want
			  normal versions of these, don't include BOOMUSER.WAD;
			  however, if you do this, the Burmese Glare of Death
			  will have an all-too familiar and decidedly
			  un-cat-like sound!
May Not Run With...	: Any non-Boom-compliant source port. This will NOT
			  run with the orignal ID executables. It was tested 
			  with ZDoom 2.0.98, GZDoom 0.9.16 and PRBoom 2.2.6.

Authors MAY use the contents of this file as a base for modification or
reuse provided that you give the author access to a copy and give them the
right to use parts of your work in future releases. You must also credit
all contributors. Permissions have been obtained from original author for
any of their resources modified or included in this file.

You MAY (and are encouraged to) distribute THE BAD GUYS provided:

    (1) This entire collection of files is distributed UNMODIFIED,
	preferably in the original ZIP file in which it should have come. I
	have received permission from the original authors of any modified
	or included content in this file to allow further distribution.
    (2) The distribution is on a non-commercial basis; you may put BOMBAY72
	GUYS on FTP sites or CD or other media as part of a collection for 
	which you are charging a fee as long as you understand that the fee 
	is for the collecting and (if applicable) the media, *not* for 
	BOMBAY72.
    (3) You accept that as with all free systems provided free of charge for
	like-minded people, BOMBAY72 is NOT guaranteed to work completely or 
	correctly although it is likely to do so; thus it is a condition of 
	use that you accept that as with most such products, you use it at 
	your own risk. BOMBAY72 is **NOT** designed to be fault-tolerant!
    (4) Any legal disputes over BOMBAY72 or any part of it, including these
	terms and conditions, shall be governed by the Laws of England; 
	furthermore, you do not have permission to use THE BAD GUYS in any 
	jurisdiction whose laws modify or limit these conditions unless you 
	VOLUNTARILY accept these conditions as if under the Laws of England.

I assume that Coeurl and other characters in "Voyage of the Space Beagle"
and "Black Destroyer" are copyright of A E van Vogt; as for BOMBAY72, that
must be considered only as a homage to the originals.

All the DOOM characters are copyright of ID Software.

All other characters and indicia hinted at or otherwise mentioned for humour 
or satire are copyright/trademark/property (as applicable) of their owners, 
hereby acknowledged. 

The story is my own original work. While it has some elements in common with 
"Jurassic Park" and "Alien Resurrection", I first wrote it in 1997 and in 
fact I first read the idea of using DNA to bring back the dead with total 
memory recall in "Time is the Traitor", a short story written in 1953 by 
Alfred Bester. As with many SF ideas, it may have been done before then.

* Where to get the file that this text file describes *

The Usual: ftp://archives.3dgamers.com/pub/idgames and mirrors.

* Additional files you may want *

1) There's no "Voyage of the Space Beagle - the Total Conversion" as yet but
   with INVADE1.WAD (which is worth having anyway) by Andy Chen and Claude
   Martins, Bombay72 somewhat resembles the short story.
   ftp://archives.3dgamers.com/pub/idgames/levels/doom/g-i/invade1.zip

2) The demon-infested levels of AMANDA.WAD and AMANDA2.WAD (sorry, I don't
   have credits for those) are great for hand-to-paw combat. Beware though,
   Amanda whoever she is, is a VERY nasty person: you will get killed OFTEN!

* History *

Bombay72 started out as an idea for a generic player-as-cat simulation which
was inspired by Toffee's gory delivery of a dead mouse's guts or head on the
front doorstep every other day or so. I wondered what it might be like to BE
a cat, and realised DOOM was one way to find out.

Jason realised, as did I, that a normal domestic cat simulation was too tame
for DOOM, but I thought there MUST be SOME way of making it work; then I
remembered Coeurl and thought "Now _that's_ an idea."

I had originally planned a four episode WAD comprising different styles of
feline existence: domestic, jungle, VOtSB-TC and even Phoenix! (Cats catch
birds don't they? And replacing Lost Souls and Cacodemons with creatures
from my ALL TIME favourite arcade game would have been great to do). Still,
all that is WAY too ambitious for my first WAD, so for now, enjoy Bombay72
with your favourite WADS and let me know of any suggestions you may have.

* Frequently Asked Questions *

Q: Why is it called Bombay72?
A: My mother had a cat called Toffee who was the result of an accidental
   mating between a GCCF standard Brown Burmese cat and a black mongrel.
   This combination was used by UK cat breeders to create a "Black Burmese"
   in the style of the "mini-panther" cats of US breeder Nikki Horner (who
   had used Sable Burmese and American Shorthairs). An an all-black cat is
   quite difficult if not impossible to breed in most subspecies of cat.
   Toffee was so like a real Bombay that you couldn't tell the difference
   until very close up and  his antics inspired me to design this DOOM
   conversion. The "72" is the official GCCF breed number of the Bombay
   breed, hence "Bombay 72". There are other colours of Bombay now - blue,
   chocolate, lilac and such. If you want to know more, visit the Bombay and
   Asian Self Breed Club web site on www.bombaybreedclub.org.

Q: Why have you designed Bombay72?
A: I often wondered what it would be like to be a cat; I have always admired
   cats for their quiet ruthless efficiency, their strength, grace and beauty
   and their ability to rise above all the stupidity that goes on around them.
   These characteristics come from their (mostly) solitary nature. It occured
   to me that these characteristics would show up well in single-player DOOM
   and so I wanted to see what it was like - and Bombay72 is the result!

Q: Will Bombay72 work with the various Doom hacks/ports?
   Only those that can load a DeHackEd patch from within a WAD file and can
   understand BOOM BEX string definition format. No other Boom features are
   used. Tested with ZDoom 2.0.98, GZDoom 0.9.16 and PRBoom 2.2.6.

Q: What are you: A psycho? A crack-head? A nutcase?
A: No. No. Probably :-)

* Change Log *

V0.9.87 08-NOV-2005
   Minor documentation updates.
   Fixed GROWL/CHAINGUN limitation for ZDoom (can't be fixed for BOOM).

V0.9.86 23-DEC-2002
   Documentation updates. NO CHANGES TO THE GAME.

V0.9.85 21-DEC-2002
   Fixed "arms floating in thin air" bug in full-screen view for the RL and
   the PR. Install routine in case people want to use Archvile sounds and
   graphics instead of the defaults (which are from the TiC flame patch).

V0.9.80 17-DEC-2002
   Much cleaner and less silly-sounding player death sounds.

V0.9.75 16-DEC-2002
   Vastly improved Curse of Bast.
   Thunder rolls and the demons are struck down by lightning!

V0.9.70 15-DEC-2002
   Fixed goddess name bug; while "Bastet" is a legitemate use for the name
   of the goddess, "Bast" is more normally used in conversational speech.

   Replaced the telekinetic tentacle killing (chaingun) with the Burmese 
   Glare of Death to put a true "Bombay" spin on it.

   Put the BEX patch in the WAD (a Boom-compliant port is now required).

   Dropped original id EXE compatibility (obsolete).

V0.9.22 17-MAY-1998
   Feline difficulty level strings (thanks to J. P. Morris)

   Status face damage levels. (These graphics suck; I am a computer
   technologist, not an artist, so if anyone wants to have a go
   and replace them, feel free to try as long as I get a copy!)

   Three bonus items. No automated install for these as yet, but
   most DOOMers should be able to use them.

   (1)    A .BEX version of the .DEH patch for BOOM users. Two
          minor improvements over the .DEH version. See inside 
          the file for details.

   (2)    A special version of the .DEH file called B72ATC.DEH
          This is a hack that will allow you to run Bombay72 
          with Aliens-TC. See the file B72Atc.txt for details.

   (3)    A special version of the .DEH file called B72SIR.DEH
          This is a hack that will allow you to run Bombay72 
          with Sirens-TC. See the file B72Sir.txt for details.

V0.7.21, 07-DEC-97
   Fixed bugs in install program vis-a-vis TNT & Plutonia
   Put in autodetection of DOOM game.

V0.7.20, 30-NOV-97
   Preview Release

* Weapons *

 1 = single paw/berserk paw (was fist)
 2 = slashing paws (was pistol, actually chainsaw)
 3 = super punch (was double-barrelled Shotgun)
 4 = the Burmese Glare of Death (was chaingun)
 5 = flaming balls of phosphorous (was rockets)
 6 = the magic power of throwing flames, bestowed by Sekhmet (was plasma)
 7 = the Curse of Bast (was BFG9000)

 1) You start out with a normal swipe of the paw and with slashing paws.

 2) All chainsaws are redefined as Berserk Packs since it is now pointless to
    have other chainsaws, and since there isn't a way to issue other weapons
    as standard at the start of a game, this seems like a good compromise.

 3) For the punch to work, you need to be using a truly compliant source
    port that behaves as iD's "dual-mode" DOOM executables -- that is, can
    be DOOM or DOOM2 according to which IWAD file is found. The punch works
    by redefining shotguns as super-shotguns and since these weapons are
    usually at close-quarters, the effect looks really cool. The downside,
    from a realism point of view, is that the punch always sounds and works
    at a distance.

 4) Inspired, more-or-less by the book, the Burmese Glare of Death puts a
    true "Bombay" spin on it - the GCCF standard Burmese (breed no. 27, from
    which the Bombay, breed No. 72, is derived) has a wide-eared face and
    slightly oriental eyes, giving it an almost vampire-bat like appearance.
    This has been referred to as "The Gloriously evil look of the Burmese"
    and is especially noticable given their ability to emit a deep-chested
    growl like that of a dog.

 5) The cat "Coeurl" fed on phosphorous, coincidentally referred to as "id"
    by A E van Vogt; thus he throws flaming balls of phosphorus extracted
    from rockets and other ammo.

 6) If the cat finds the staff that Sekhmet is usually portrayed as holding,
    it gives him the magic power to throw flames at the demons from his paws.

 7) Bast is often portrayed as a domestic cat with a collar; putting on the
    collar bestows the power to curse the demons and strike them down dead.

* To Do *

Other environment conversions, particularly in the TEXT section.

Better rationalisation of health. You cannot change the player's hit points
in DeHackEd, so I have resorted to using excessive health. The exact balance
needs improving, as the game is too easy right now.

Bombay 72 urgently needs DeathMatch graphics, better status face graphics
and, in fact, better graphics all round. I have almost no manual dexterity
(except with a BFG:-) and would be quite willing to dedicate BIG credits in
the readme file to anyone who is willing to contribute these for Bombay72.

If you can help and are interested or have general suggestions, e-mail me
on martinhowe@myprivacy.ca.

* Prologue *

Run! Run! Run, in the choking heat of the summer of 1995; run, mad like lots
of small pets twisted by the heat that year; run, across the field from Temple
Way, past the Church footpath; run, fasterandfaster, acrossthefieldsof
Kent, downtocross theSandwich-Dealroad; move, acrosstheroadandseethebright
lightsoftheapproachingcarheadingstraighttowardsmyheadand -

THUNK! Toffee woke with a start; where the *** HELL ***? This wasn't the happy
hunting ground, he saw no mice; in fact he saw nothing at all, but he could
SMELL; SMELL the <<people>> nearby; SMELL the formica tones of the flat slab
on which he lay; SMELL the <<disinfectant>> all over the place, just like at
the <<vet>>'s -- but something was wrong. This was not the <<vet>>'s.

Words cameintohishead inasharpunabatingflowoverwheliminglyfasttobeginwith --
"what's a <<word>>?", thought Toffee; "why am I not <<dead>>?"; "why can I
hear these <<words>> as if I where human"; "why is <<first person>> <<I>>
<<uppercased>>" and, "<<dammit>>, whatever that means, where * AM * I?".

Carefully, Toffee opened his eyes and scanned the room. Immediately, he
noticed that his head was *way* too high off the slab for his body, which in
turn felt larger than it should be and he could HEAR; HEAR the breathing of
the two humans in the room; HEAR the two humans just outside the <<door>> and
HEAR the machines quietly whirring away. The humans in the room were dressed
in the white smocks that he knew identified them as <<scientists>> to other
humans, while the ones outside smelt of grease, rough cloth, and metal; they
were <<soldiers>> he felt, and the implements that they carried he knew to
be <<guns>>, but again, the <<guns>> - they glowed and Toffee realised that
he could see the <<guns>> through the door. Even though he couldn't see the
soldiers, he could see the guns, or rather the <<magazines>>...they pulsated
to his senses with a lustful throbbing glow, as if containing --

One of the scientists interrupted his reverie:

"Y'know I'm still not sure about raiding the remains of a housing estate
looking for dead cats, Josef; I mean, what has a domestic kitty got in common
with that - that *thing* they found out there?"

"Oh c'm on, Adolf", replied the other one, "the dissassociated molecules of
that animal just wouldn't bond with a lion or leopard; biologically it was
more like a pussycat than a panther."

"Huh. It was more like us than anything; thank Gieger their attempts at space
flight failed or we'd really be up the creek."

Toffee realised that Josef regarded him as really a nice pussycat with a the
body of a (well, sort of a) panther, whereas Adolf distrusted him, and must
have been responsible for the light electric (?) field that surrounded the
table. Maybe that was just a precaution, but then his sweeping eyes caught the
plaque on the other side of the room...and his heart leapt with horror!

There, on the plaque, were the words:

                        Union Aerospace Corporation

Even with the small amount of knowledge given to him via the <<thing>>'s
partial telepathy, oddly imparted to him, he knew that the name on that
plaque was, to all decent humans, synonymous for unspeakable ** EVIL **.

Even as he realised the horrors that had been done to him to rebuild him in
this state, he realised all the more that he was HUNGRY. The nearest human's
body was by now *glowing*, as his senses became more acute, with that warmth
that spoke of food; he wondered whether --

And he could stand it no longer: with a massive effort comprising most of what
strength he had left, he frowned hard, the weird strands above his ears waving
slowly as he tried to worm his way through the force-field around the table.
Adolf stared first in fright, then in horror as he realised what was happening
and opened his mouth to shout - but Toffee was through and with one massive
blow from his left paw, he SPLATTERED JOSEF'S HEAD TO A SPRAYING MUSH OF BLOOD
AND BONE FRAGMENTS! "What's <<DSSLOP>>?", thought Toffee idly, as he punctured
Adolf's right lung with 2 inches of steel-hard claw and ripped off his head.

Even as the soldiers heard the screams and were moving to open the door,
Toffee swarmed through the bodies of the scientists, rendering their carcasses
for the bright yellow fever locked up in the chemicals of their flesh. He felt
invigourated now and turned, and as Pte Gerry I Joe turned into the room,
he saw this **thing**, part cat, part obscenity coming at him at 100 meters
per second; CRUNCH! - his head was swallowed whole and as his lifeless
body fell to the ground ["Who is this, Mack Bolam?", thought Toffee], the
pussycat/horror clawed Sgt. Jane Doe's face clean off, grabbing as he did
the magazine of the rifle she held, tearing it open for the goodies inside.

As he fed with gusto on the two soldiers he had just killed (not forgetting
the other gun magazine) he became aware of a noise filling the compound -
"wee-arrgh! wee-arrgh! wee-arrgh! wee...".

"What?" thought Toffee, and then he understood that the alarm was sounding.
He sprinted off down the corridor, the vison of the map-reading lessons
the soldiers had been to recently still in his head; they had used this place
as an initial training stint and he knew that somewhere, there was a way out
of here. As he approached room #426 he had the vague feeling that he was
not the only experiment that had gone wrong in the last few hours. The
door was continually being punctured by fingers, slim, dark and deadly; and
just as he got there, the door gave way and some <<things>> ran out at him;
they were all teeth and mouths, eight feet tall, terrifying, deadly and -

THWACK! Toffee slammed the nearest one over by its head with his left paw, and
as he did so grabbed with his right what appeared to be a second mouth and
SPLUTCH! -- PULLED IT CLEAN OUT OF ITS SOCKET!! In a flowing move, he bit open
its chest cavity, tore its tail off, snapped its forearms in half and, after
throttling its neck (to make sure it was really dead), he turned to the other
one advancing on him - AND RAKED ITS SKULL OPEN, clawing at the brains inside
for the glowing substance therein. As he tried to lap up the nutrient-laden
liquid that had spilled from the animals' bodies before it ate its way through
the armoured, anodised floor, he became aware of smaller things that scuttled
around; as he turned into the room one turned, charging up at his face and -

<<DESSERT!>> The human word came unbidden into his head and he whipped out
his right forepaw, sliced its legs and tail off and scooped the little thing
entire into his mouth. "Hey these are GREAT!", he thought as he felt the
crunchy bit in the middle give way, "and you don't even have to catch them!"
Maybe UAC weren't so bad after all.

Toffee stopped; like most cats, he knew when he had had enough food and in any
case, he could hear soldiers running to the scene. Looking up at the walls he
saw grilles across what were obviously ventilation ducts; he ripped one off
the wall and jumped up into it. The humans were so *stupid* to have things set
out like this, he thought idly as he crawled towards the spaceport area; it
was as if there was a <<law>> requiring every military establishment in the
21st century and beyond to provide air ducts for the use of prowling monsters
to kill people, evade detection and generally cause havoc.

He pushed open a maintenance hatch in a quiet corner of a room and gingerly
walked out to the airstrip loading bay. As a squad of security guards came
around the corner, he looked for cover and dived into the nearest unguarded
undercarriage bay, which belonged to a ship marked "Bound For Phobos".

He heard soldiers boarding the ship and because they were so fired up for
their mission, he could catch fragments of their thoughts.

"What are we going for, eh? Kick some alien butt, I'll be bound!"

"These aliens are from Hell itself, so they say; well we'll GIVE 'em hell
 and fry their asses good and proper"

"Hey, did you know, that the Cult of Yesterday's Egypt has a temple on Mars?
 My wife is fed up with the Romero's Witnesses and anyway, I can't talk
 backwards for Toffee - what, oh sorry, I mean toffee (why did I say that?);
 anyway she turned to all these old new-age pagan gods, y'know worshipping
 cats and mummifying their dead. They say the've even got the collar of the
 cat goddess herself down there."

"Psst!"

"Yeah, that's her, or 'Bast', or 'Bastet' or 'Phast'; and then of course
 there's supposed to be a statue of Seckmet with the actual staff she used,
 right in their museum for-"

"What?! No you idiot, 'psst', as in BE QUIET, SOLDIER!"

"(ulp) Yessir!"

Toffee turned his ears to the flight deck:

"Well, pilot", said the captain, "we can't land at the CYE facility, it
 looks all shot up; the enemy must've been here before us."

"Yeah, but that's weird sir; sensors indicate the temple's been looted; all
 the security systems down there are going wild. What the hell do aliens
 from another dimension want with ancient relics of pagan worship? Do they
 believe the artifacts give magic power to whoever possesses them?"

"Probably; or else they want something to remind them of home. Anyhow, I bet
 those new-agers probably asked the UAC science facility to open up a
 gateway to heaven and some dopehead pen-pusher dialled the wrong number!"

Eventually, the ship landed near the UAC facility and the soldiers made their
way towards the compound. One soldier (as luck would have it the one whose
wife belonged to the CYE) was ordered to stay behind and secure the perimeter,
while the others went inside.

As the hours wore on the soldier and Toffee, who was hiding in the long grass
behind him, could hear all kinds of noises and screams and then: silence. The
soldier knew his buddies must have been well and truly fragged and in a heroic
gesture, started to walk towards the -

Crack! Toffee knocked him down, but not too hard; this human's feelings were
quite clear; he liked cats and anyway, had joined up to defend his country
and his world against its enemies, not to "play at soldiers". The young man
didn't deserve to die alone wading knee-deep in the dead; and besides, what
could he do against these foul demons armed with only pistol and fist?

Anyway, besides threatening to destroy the world, end life as it was known,
kill the humans and enslave the other animals -- these vile aliens had
*dared* to steal the Holy Flame-Staff of Sekhmet and the Sacred Collar of
Bast -- and for that alone, thought Toffee as he trotted into the hangar...

                            THEY MUST *** DIE ***!


Martin Howe
martinhowe@myprivacy.ca
08th November 2005
